I have never realized these words, up intil tonight… Those words ‘Letting Go’, for the first time it really made sence to me… Its the most hardest thing to do as being human, but have you realized that life goes around and round, over and over…. Until…. I finally ‘Let Go’…. I made my peace now, if you know me you would exactly knew what I am going through every single day of my life on earth… The funny thing is….. I just cant get a way where I am NOT in anyones path or way in life…. Sumhow I end up getting stuck in sumones life, and then it’s the same nonsense over again…. I’m at that stage where I have realized more than I actually should… To tell you the deepest truth from the bottom of my heart, I tried and gave my at most BEST that I could in life just to be there for my boys and show them their mommy LOVES them…. I have lost my work, my dignety, my self respect, MYSELF……. I live next door from my Mom’s house and my boys stays with my Mom… It’s the most hardest thing any parent can go through in their life…. Today seeing my baby sat down infront the yard, while suposed to go home… I went outside and sat next to him, and asked him what’s wrong my baby…. He told me, he doesnt want to go home….. Yeah what can I say, that broke me into so many pieces that no one and nothing can ever fix me anymore…. I am always the person who goes out of my way to help people and do things for them to make them happy, and then in the end … its….. It doesnt matter anymore, the point is, I have lost every single thing in my life coz of people, so why even bother still be here… The person who is going to get in my way this time will regret it… This time there’s no turning back… I am Letting Go and making peace…
A Letter To The People That Hurted Me ! _______________________________________Dear Human Being: I want to write to you so I can let you know that you have let me down. I could write the words over and over again, but I realize it changes nothing. I could scream it at the top of my lungs and let the world know how you have hurted me, but the past will not hear me or pay me any mind. I could hate you. I could keep that hatred for you deep inside of me and let it hide there safely as a reminder of the pain you brought me. But I am the only one who knows that it exists and lets it eat away at my heart, so why create it? I was your friend. I was your family. I was your lover. You are a person that could have been any number of things to me. Heartbreak plays no favorites when it chooses people in life to let you down. I really always had faith in you. I trusted you and the promises that you made to me. I believed in your aspirations and disregarded your ambiguity. I saw the beautiful parts of who you were. I made plans with you and kept them in my head like a guaranteed magnificent destination. I loved you. I gave you all that I had and now I am left feeling empty and cheated. But do you know what the strangest and most unbelievably frustrating part of all of this is? I forgive you. You and I are different people, but in the end we are the same. We are only human. As humans, we let each other down. We promise love before we know what it really means. We abuse trust. We break hearts. We make mistakes. I have made my fair share of mistakes as well. I’m sure I have hurted you too. I know there are parts of you that I never will truely understand and therefore cannot fit into the small boxes of reasoning that I have tried to place around these complex situations. I know that there was a reason why I believed in you, and therefore there is a reason why I still want the absolute best for you. Friendship, family and relationships seem so well defined with their expectations, but very rarely are all those expectations going to be met. This is the chance you take in believing in people. In the end, loving each other only teaches us about love, as a separate and beautiful entity that is unparalleled to anything else in this world. You could be a lover, friend, parent, child or borderline stranger. Whoever you are, I want you to know that you have hurted me, but I forgive you. I don’t forgive you because it makes me feel like a good person. I don’t forgive you because I don’t want to deal with the recognition of your actions. I don’t forgive you because I have forgotten. On the contrary, I forgive you because I remember. I remember that you are a human and humans teach each other in both positive and negative ways. I remember that you brought me memories and emotions that made me feel alive. I remember that if you were worth my trust and love, you are worth my forgiveness and I am strong and alive and free to experience all depths of love and loss. I am blessed for the moments that I have and the moments that I have lost. You are a piece of me, and that piece will not eat away at my soul like hatred would. And for that I will be a better person going forward. With Love: Mandy
https://www.videosprofitnetwork.com/watch.xml?key=99323d9677e8835fb152587e6ff95a6d
A Thousand Words 